You know, I’ve been thinking a lot about Thanksgiving lately. Not just the turkey and stuffing part: though I do love a good meal: but what it really means to be thankful as a leader.
Why is it that we get so caught up in the daily grind that we forget to pause and appreciate the people who make everything possible?
Last week, I was working with a CEO who told me he was “too busy” to thank his team properly. Too busy! Can you imagine? The very people who were making his success possible, and he was too busy to acknowledge them. It got me thinking about how backward we sometimes have this whole leadership thing.
The Magic That Happens When Leaders Get Grateful
Here’s something I’ve learned from years of coaching high-performers: gratitude isn’t just a nice-to-have soft skill. It’s a performance tool. When you truly appreciate your team: and I mean really see them: something magical happens.
Think about it. When was the last time someone genuinely thanked you for something specific you did? Not just a quick “thanks” as they rushed by, but someone who actually stopped, looked you in the eye, and said something like: “That presentation you gave yesterday? The way you handled that tough question from the client showed real grace under pressure. Thank you for representing us so well.”
How did that make you feel? Energized? Motivated to do even better next time? That’s the power we’re talking about.
Research shows that teams who feel genuinely appreciated demonstrate higher engagement, better performance, and stick around longer. But here’s what the research doesn’t capture: the feeling in the room when a leader creates that culture of appreciation. The way people’s shoulders relax. The way they start supporting each other more. The way problems get solved faster because everyone feels they’re part of something meaningful.
Making Thanksgiving a Leadership Practice, Not Just a Holiday
You know what I love about Thanksgiving? It’s one day a year when we give ourselves permission to be genuinely grateful. But here’s my question for you: Why just one day?
I worked with a team leader once who started something simple. Every Friday, she’d send a text or email to someone on her team, thanking them for something specific they’d done that week. Not generic praise: specific appreciation. “Thank you for staying calm when the system crashed on Tuesday. Your steady presence helped everyone else stay focused too.”
That’s it. One text. One email. But by the end of the year, she had the most engaged team in the company. Coincidence? I don’t think so.
The thing is, we often think gratitude has to be this big, formal thing. A company-wide email. An awards ceremony. And sure, those have their place. But sometimes the most powerful appreciation happens in the quiet moments. The handwritten note. The genuine “thank you” at the end of a tough meeting. The willingness to really listen when someone needs to be heard.
What Gets in Our Way?
So if gratitude is so powerful, why don’t we do it more?
I think we get caught up in the idea that acknowledging good work somehow diminishes our authority. Like if we appreciate people too much, they’ll get soft. Or entitled. But in my experience, it’s the opposite. People who feel genuinely valued work harder, not less. They care more about the outcome because they know their contribution matters.
Sometimes we’re just moving too fast. We see the good work, we feel the appreciation, but we don’t slow down enough to express it. We think, I’ll thank them later when I have more time. But later never comes, does it?
And sometimes: and this one’s harder to admit: we’re so focused on what’s not working that we miss what is. We notice the missed deadline but overlook the extra effort someone put in to help a colleague. We see the problem but miss the creative solution someone tried.
The Ripple Effect of Real Appreciation
Here’s what I’ve noticed about leaders who make gratitude a practice: their people start doing it too. Appreciation becomes contagious. Team members begin recognizing each other. They start supporting one another more naturally. The whole culture shifts.
I remember working with a department that was struggling with morale. The manager decided to start each team meeting by asking one simple question: “Who would you like to appreciate this week, and why?”
At first, it felt awkward. People weren’t used to it. But within a month, something beautiful started happening. People began looking for ways to support each other, just so they’d have something to share. The focus shifted from what was wrong to what was working.
Why is it that we don’t create more opportunities like this?
Beyond Thank You: Seeing People Fully
Real appreciation goes deeper than just saying thank you. It’s about seeing people fully: their strengths, their growth, their unique contributions. It’s about noticing not just what someone did, but who they were in the doing of it.
Maybe someone didn’t have the perfect solution, but they showed courage in trying something new. Maybe the project didn’t go exactly as planned, but someone demonstrated incredible resilience in adapting. Maybe the numbers weren’t quite where you wanted them, but someone showed real care for a struggling team member.
When we appreciate people for who they’re becoming, not just what they’re producing, we help them grow into the best versions of themselves.
A Thanksgiving Challenge for Leaders
So here’s what I’m wondering: What if this Thanksgiving, instead of just being grateful for your team, you actually told them? What if you got specific about what you appreciate? What if you made it personal?
Think about each person who reports to you. What’s one thing they’ve done recently that you haven’t acknowledged? What strength have you noticed in them that maybe they don’t even see in themselves yet? What difference have they made that you’ve been meaning to mention but haven’t found the time?
Why not now?
I’m not talking about false praise or participation trophies. I’m talking about genuine recognition of real contribution. The kind that helps people understand their value and motivates them to keep growing.
Making It Stick
The beautiful thing about gratitude is that it doesn’t cost anything except attention. But like any practice, it gets easier the more you do it. Maybe you start with one appreciation a week. Maybe you end meetings by asking what went well. Maybe you make it a point to catch people doing things right instead of just waiting for them to mess up.
The key is making it genuine and specific. People can tell the difference between real appreciation and going through the motions.
And here’s a little secret: when you start actively looking for reasons to be grateful, you find them everywhere. Your whole perspective shifts. Problems become challenges to solve together. Setbacks become opportunities to see how people respond under pressure. Ordinary Tuesday afternoons become chances to witness someone’s dedication to getting things right.
This Thanksgiving, as you sit around your own table expressing gratitude, remember that leadership is really just an extended version of the same thing. Creating space for people to feel seen, valued, and appreciated for who they are and what they bring.
Your team is waiting. Not for the perfect moment or the formal recognition program. They’re waiting for you to notice what they’re already giving and to let them know it matters.
What are you grateful for today? And more importantly, who needs to hear it?
Namaste.